My 9th grade… to be honest, i don't know how to put it to words. If ut was another person instead of me who
experienced the things i did, the might've wanted to seek professional help hahdhayshd- Maybe im the problem
myself. Who knows. I never saw another person like me.
I was expecting a good friend group. Yeah, it might sound weird that i wasn't expecting things about grades,
classes and stuff. But as long as i know i never had good friends that i could share my thoughts and bond myself
with.
I'm not special, I'm just lonely.
As you can see, i went through a lot of hardships last year but that doesn't mean that good things never
happened to me. Like yesterday i got a 5 star character in my favorite game!
(Note: i'm so happy actually. Life is hard but eventually it will get easier when you are happy with the things
the way they are. Im not fond of new things in my life, I also never tried to create something new. I'm always
scared of things that im not used to, i don't want to leave my comfort zone, so i expended it. I tried making
online friends because sharing my thoughts with temporary people makes me feel safer. One of my polish friends
gifted me a game that i wanted for a real long time. I had no idea that i would own that game one day. Because
that game truly changed the way i see my life. The birthday gift made me so happy. Even if the people that i
love are psychically unreachable, i can still talk to them ans thats enough for me.)
1- I feel that my parents and others expect a lot from me, causing me to feel like a burden when I do something
wrong even if it's not serious.
2- I replay conversations in my head, wondering if I said something wrong.
3- I'm so exhausted, it doesn't matter whether I rest well or not. I think it's mental.
4- I feel like I'm always surrounded by people but I'm never really seen.
5- I know it kills my brain and affects me a lot but I can't stop playing video games, I know it but I don't
want to try to end this bad habit, I don't want to quit playing.